I imagine we all have a few favorite writers.
Sahil Bloom is one of mine.
If you’re not aware of Sahil, you should be. He’s an excellent writer, and over 800,000 people (!!) subscribe to his free newsletter. You don’t get that big without doing something right. He writes frequently on his Substack channel, The Curiosity Channel, and almost every article makes me pause. Makes me think. Isn’t that what good writing is supposed to do?
In a recent article, I shared that I was going to do an experiment in recognition of J$ (if you’ve been a long-time reader, you know I love experiments). For this experiment, I’ve decided to share a guest article each month that’s the best I’ve read in the previous month. I welcome your feedback on the approach. I may keep at it, or I may not…isn’t that what experiments are all about?
For May’s Guest Article, I’ve selected an article Sahil originally published in April. When I read it, I reached out to Sahil and asked if he’d mind me sharing it as a guest post on my blog.
Fortunately, he agreed!
Enjoy the read, it’s a good one…
Just Make the Coffee
A few years ago, I came across a beautiful story written by a woman named Pam Kearney in a local newspaper.
I set a calendar reminder to re-read this every single year:
I visited Matthew, the owner of Lucy’s Flour Shop a little while back. As I nibbled on an enormous chocolate chip cookie I began to tell him a story.
A few years back on a bitterly cold December evening, there was a visitation at the funeral home across the street from his bakery.
The people, bundled up in coats, scarves, and blankets were lined up around the building waiting to hug the family of the deceased.
Seemingly out of nowhere, a man showed up and began giving away hot coffee to the people outside. People who entered the funeral home with coffee in their hands whispered of a mysterious man handing out free coffee, and how much they appreciated it.
I looked at Matthew and said, “I have a suspicion that you were that man. Is that right?”
Matthew very humbly replied, “Yes, I felt so bad for them and wanted to do something, but all I could do was make coffee, so I made coffee.”
I responded that he blessed so many people that night by helping them warm up and by showing there’s good in the world. He added a positive note to a devastating situation.
I paused, then added, “That visitation was for my sixteen-year-old son. Thank you for being so kind.”
That conversation has stuck in my head since then:
“All I could do was make coffee, so I made coffee.”
I want you to read that final line again…
“All I could do was make coffee, so I made coffee.”
You can imagine Matthew, standing in his shop, looking out at the line of people standing in the cold on that December evening.
In that moment, I’m sure he felt rather helpless, even paralyzed. He wanted to do something to help, but the imperfection of his options weighed on him.
He couldn’t change the weather. He couldn’t reverse their loss. He couldn’t take away their sadness or suffering.
All he could do was make coffee, so he made coffee.
The Most Important Decision in Life
Every single day, we face our own version of this situation.
Different circumstances, yes, but the same general experience:
We feel stuck. Completely frozen. Not because of the lack of options, but because none of the options are perfect. None of the options feel big enough. None will solve the entire problem or fix the entire issue.
So, most of the time, we do nothing.
But nothing is the one option that’s guaranteed to change nothing.
Since starting this newsletter five years ago, I’ve shared over 500 pieces and 1,000,000 words.
If I could synthesize the lessons down to one single statement, it would be the following:
Do the thing.
Take the action. Just start. Show up. Make the move. Walk the path.
Because the change you want to see doesn’t happen unless you create it. The new life you want doesn’t magically appear. It’s built through action. New habits. New mindsets. New standards. New boundaries.
Action, however imperfect, is always the cost of entry.
I might think of it as the Paradox of Imperfection:
The most perfect outcomes are often just a byproduct of a large volume of imperfect actions.
In the immortal words of Teddy Roosevelt:
“Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.”
As you continue on this crazy adventure we call life, you will face daily moments that conspire to make you feel completely helpless. You’ll feel paralyzed. Unable to see a clear path to create momentum or improve the situation.
In these moments, you have a decision to make:
- You can freeze, paralyzed by the imperfection of your options…or
- You can act. You can do what you can, with what you have, where you are. You can make the coffee.
This is the single most important decision of your life.
Reflect on the moments where you or someone you know “made the coffee” and changed everything.
When my childhood home burned down in 2014, our friends couldn’t rebuild the house, help with the insurance, save the lost items, or do anything to turn back time.
But they showed up: They brought my parents home-cooked meals, bought them fresh underwear, and sat with them for hours.
They made the coffee.
When an old college friend was in a dark place in his life, battling alcohol abuse, our friend group was spread across the country. We couldn’t give him any meaningful advice or stage an intervention.
But we showed up: We organized group FaceTime calls to be with him, to let him know he was loved.
We made the coffee.
When I found myself in a terrible rut in 2021, living far away from my parents, lost and uncertain about the future, I couldn’t snap my fingers and change everything. I couldn’t change my life in a day.
But I showed up: I started writing every morning, following my energy, and opened a conversation with my wife about a move.
I made the coffee.
Making the coffee isn’t just for the moments of turmoil or crisis. It’s for the ordinary Tuesday when you dread getting out of your warm bed. It’s for the business idea that’s been sitting in your head for two years. It’s for the hard conversation you’ve been avoiding. It’s for the workout you want to skip on the day when everything fell into chaos. It’s for the dream that feels too big to begin.
The moments themselves can be big or small, but the lesson is clear:
Action doesn’t have to be perfect for it to be right.
So, the next time you face a situation and start to feel helpless, remember:
Just make the coffee.
Conclusion
Fritz here for a quick wrap-up. What resonated with me as I read Sahil’s words was the reality that each of us has opportunities to “Make The Coffee” and change everything.
Or, we can choose to do nothing.
How often do we face an opportunity, but choose to do nothing for lame reasons?
- We’re too busy.
- We don’t want to get involved.
- We assume others will take care of it.
On the contrary, think of those few cases when you decided to “Make The Coffee.” If you’re like me, the examples that come to mind warm your heart. You feel good about the impact you made, the people you helped, and the changes you made in someone’s life.
There’s no better time than retirement to look for opportunities to make the coffee. We have freedom unlike any other period in our lives. We don’t need to work for money anymore, and it gives us opportunities to help those who aren’t as fortunate. And yet, we often make excuses and pass on opportunities that could change our lives, and those of others.
It brings to mind the amazing work my wife is doing through her charity, Freedom For Fido. When she founded the charity in 2019, she had a decision to make. Should she take the first step and see what she could do to help the countless dogs in our region who live on chains? Or should she do nothing?
She decided to make the coffee.
I’ve witnessed firsthand the impact that one decision has made on an entire community. We’ve built over 200 fences, helped over 600 dogs and hundreds of families in need, and built an entire “Fido Family” of like-minded volunteers who want to make a difference with their time and resources.
You don’t have to start a charity to make a difference. Just pay attention to the needs of those around you. Listen when someone mentions something they’re dealing with. Think about how you can help, rather than why you shouldn’t. Stop making excuses and look for ways to use your freedom in retirement to help those in need.
It’s time to make the coffee.
Your Turn: Care to share a time you made the coffee? What did you do, and how did it make you feel? Also, I welcome your thoughts on my latest experiment. Let’s chat in the comments…
Such a pleasure to see this piece shared by someone I admire. Thank you for sharing, my friend! Wishing everyone the best for the rest of 2026 and beyond!
Just make the coffee!
How appropriate that Sahil came in with the first comment. Love your work, Sahil, thanks for the kind words about my work. Thanks again for letting me share your post today, much appreciated.
Hi Fritz. You asked for feedback so here is mine, with respect: Not a fan of reposted stories. Seems that that is becoming a bigger and bigger part of blogs, substack etc. I have enjoyed and benefited from your writing, Regarding others’ writing, I prefer to find it on my own, and know that when I see something new from you, it is something new from you. Regards- Mark L
I respect your opinion Mark though I love the thoughtful reposted stories as I’d never come across them otherwise. This one resonates with me as it’s a great reminder to always be kind and show up. Sometimes we think go big or not at all. It’s often the little things that we do that can be impactful. So relatable. it also aligns with Fritiz’s core values. I appreciate the repost.
I completely agree. If it weren’t for this post, we wouldn’t have found this treasure.
I think it’s a great way to expand the (potential) list of authors to read. You can always choose to not read a repost.
I would have never seen this original post so I’m glad that Fritz reposted it here.
This article really resonated with me. Thank you for sharing it. I wish I had time to read everything out there, maybe when I actually retire, but for now, if a writer I respect shares his favorite article with me, which is condensed down from hundreds or more articles I don’t have time to read, I appreciate it
Respectfully disagree. Everyone has a different online presence. Some are present on all platforms, reading books, consuming podcasts, engaging with content, making content for a living. But not everyone has a large internet footprint or exposure (in my case it’s intentional). I am not out there to seek and find stuff on my own, so this is perfect for me.
Fritz – knowing you are producing less content on here, I’d love to see monthly guest posts that you have cultivated and think your readers would appreciate. This was a good one.
Thanks for the encouragement, Jamie. I’m pleased to see almost every comment was favorable on the idea of sharing the monthly guest post. I love the support of the readers of this blog!
Thanks for sharing that. It leaves me with a lot to consider. One of society’s biggest issues is the lack of compassion or gratitude for our fellow human beings. This is a great reminder to do unto others as you would have them do unto you. As the Beatles sang “And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make”.
“One of society’s biggest issues is the lack of compassion or gratitude for our fellow human beings.”
True, that. All we can do is focus on what we can control, and making the coffee is something each of us can do to make a small difference in the world. And…gotta love the Beatles!
Hi Fritz. I admire your willingness to try something new. I had previously read this story and enjoyed re-reading it. I support your efforts to share one of the best stories you’ve found as your mindset and discernment are helpful. I’ve discovered a few newsletters that you had previously recommended so this works too. Stay involved with the retirement community you’ve created. You make a positive difference!
Lovin’ the encouragement today. Thanks, Bruce!
Long time reader, first time posting. I want you to know how much I enjoy reading and re-reading the articles you have posted including those by guest blogger Dana and now reposts. I appreciate that you have kept your site alive this way. I’m now less than a year out from my own retirement date and for me, everything resonates even more. Enjoy your vacation.
Stayin’ Alive, Stayin’ Alive…. 😉
Only 4 days til our departure. Excited for the break, and spending time in the RV in some beautiful places with my wife and dogs. Blessed.
I can think of more times I skipped the coffee than times I made it.
True for all of us, if we’re being honest. Hoping to change that a bit with today’s article.
Fritz…
I’ve read your newsletter since my retirement in 2021. Your insights guided me through some of the very difficult decisions I had to make as I entered this new phase of life. I would never have found your newsletter on my own… It was recommended to me by a friend. In the same way, I appreciate YOUR recommendations and reposts of newsletters written by others. It’s a great way to gain exposure to things we might otherwise miss. Keep up the great work and enjoy your best life! Thanks for everything.
Spreading the love. A lesson I learned from J$, and am happy I decided to experiment with on my blog. After 9 years of writing, it’s fun to try new things.
Thank you!
Thanks for the post Fritz. Great story and reminder of doing what we can where we are to help fill a need. The article peaked my attention and I did a little digging on the writer Pam Kearney. She appears to have “made a little coffee of her own” back in 2021 when she started a organization named “It’s Alright to be Little Bitty” which started as an effort to help her aging cowboy grandfather who had fallen into depression. She began taking miniature horses/donkeys to visit him initially as therapy to help him through his depression. She then began visiting nursing homes in the Lamesa, Tx area with the horses to provide comfort to the residents. She also provided petting/grooming sessions with local children who needed help. Great story of just “making the coffee”!
Cool story on Pam Kearney. Thanks for being curious, and pursuing that curiosity. Making the coffee, indeed.
So interesting! And oddly, one of my best friends just moved back to Lamesa to take care of his aging parents and his father died within months of his move back to his childhood hometown. It was a tough decision for him to move back because my understanding is that Lamesa is a very small agricultural town in West Texas.
That’s a great piece and it really resonates with me as a still-recent retiree. I have a lot more “coffee-making” time than I used to, or, to put it another way, a lot fewer excuses. Thank you for sharing it, and I may put on my calendar to re-read it every year!
Another Dana!? Who knew…. 😉 I hope the link to this article lives for many years on yours, and others, calendars!
Great article. Long time reader, first time poster. Now four years into retirement I’ve been spending time building homes for the local Habitat for Humanity chapter and handicap ramps for local homeowners. It always feels good to give back.
Small world, Steve. We’ve built a few handicap ramps with our Freedom For Fido work, and I did some Habitat builds back in the day. It’s a very similar environment to our Fido Builds, though we build our fences a lot quick than it takes to build a house! Glad you took time to post – what took you so long? 😉
My husband, soon to retire, has already started volunteering with the Texas Ramp Project building wooden ramps for low-income disabled folks. Through its various regions, the organization covers most of Texas.
Hi Fritz!
I enjoyed the posting of another’s story. Heartwarming true stories is what this world needs more of.
As far as serving others (make the coffee), I will most definitely agree that the giver’s heart is warmed when seeing what a difference you can make.
My wife and I agree that the best we felt in our lives may be….driving away from a Habitat home build….with cries of joy on the faces of the new home owners. I smile now writing this. What memories we cherish of each home owner we touched.
Blessings to all of you, Steve
Coffee does, indeed, warm the soul. I know that feeling you described, and have felt it myself many times. It’s one of the things that makes life good.
I love your “experiment with things” idea. That is how we learn and grow and it is great to know you are still willing to do this as you have gotten older. I would like to see you include these types of things on your site. And thank you for sharing this story. It is the first time that I heard it and it made me stop and think. So often I think, I can’t fix this, so I should do nothing. Surely, not making the situation worse is the best that I can do. But you may never know how one thing can have a positive impact on someone else. Years ago, I had a counselor tell me that what you say and do is like one drop of water on a still pond. It creates ripples and you may never see the outcome. But the impact is real.
Never Stop Experimenting! I hope to experiment for the rest of my life. Fun to keep things fresh. Thanks for the encouragement. I’ve always thought a sign of great writing was its ability to make the reader “stop and think.” Glad you had the same reaction to the original article that I did. Ironic you mentioned the ripple on the pond, I used that as an analogy in an article I wrote back in 2022….here’s the link:
https://www.theretirementmanifesto.com/the-pebble-and-the-pond/
Thanks Fritz. I’m one of your readers who enjoys your curated guest columns. The most impactful so far for me has been “12 Good Years.” The title alone is poignant.
Man, that was a good one! I can’t tell you how many times I’ve thought about that article since I first read it. Impactful, for sure. I heard from a reader this week that they decided to retire after reading Dan Haylett’s post on my site. Can’t ask for much more than that!
Hi Fritz,
Just as Bob V said, I found your blog through another post and I always appreciate when someone mentions a writer or story that resonated with them. As for just making the coffee, I look for more of these opportunities now that I am retired. We recently went through a family crisis and I can’t imagine doing it alone. The visits, the cards, the text messages, the folks that reached out and made even a small gesture meant so much. Thanks again for sharing and enjoy your trip.
They told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on, and so on, and so on…
Sorry to hear about your family crisis. Glad there were folks around who didn’t hesitate to make the coffee. Only 4 days til our trip, looking forward to it!
I love the idea of a shared guest article. I know there are some wonderful writers out there, but I’m not one to necessarily go looking for them, so you are doing it for me – thanks! I love that you added a link to their newsletter so I can visit and see if I want to sign up.
“…so you are doing it for me…”
It’s the least I could do. 😉 Thanks for the encouragement, I’ve been pleased with how many comments approve of the experiment, looks like I’ll carry on with it for a while.
Fritz
Seems like you’ve been the one “making the coffee” for many of us through your blog postings. Thanks for doing that.
I appreciate that you’re letting some others in the kitchen to do that for you (for us!) now from time to time.
This was a good one; maybe the best yet. I’ll need to take a while to drink this all in.
Thanks again,
Curt
I started donating blood last year. I don’t know why but I came across a blood drive and I thought, I can give blood regularly. I don’t have to wait. I signed up at a Red Cross center near me and I now give blood about every 5 weeks. It’s pretty fast and easy. I don’t know who is getting the blood or why, but I know there will always be a need. It’s a small thing, but it’s something.
“Sometimes, carrying on, just carrying on, is the superhuman achievement.” – Albert Camus
I trust your judgement of what is helpful to this community Fritz based on long time following. So you just keep evolving your message as life and time directs you. Great message today.
Thanks Fritz. “Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.” Is exactly right. We don’t all have money, we don’t all have many resources to share but sometimes a small gesture or a help up can make a difference. As one of my favourite artists, John Prine’s song Hello in There teaches us, just don’t pass’em by and stare as if you don’t care, say “Hello in there, hello”.
I like the experiment! I retired a year ago with help from your story and others like you. My wife is retiring tomorrow! Our journey begins!
Do the thing.
Take the action. Just start. Show up. Make the move. Walk the path.
This resonated the most and has been my biggest retirement lesson. Thankyou.
Fritz thank you for posting this great article. Lots of food for thought…and action. It reminded me of an article I read in Readers Digest decades ago. I wasn’t able to find a link to the entire article, but here is the description: (from a list of Readers Digest 32 most memorable articles!)
20. “I’ve Come to Clean Your Shoes” by Madge Harrah, from Guideposts, December 1983
The morning of a family funeral, an acquaintance shows up unannounced and says, “I’ve come to clean your shoes.” He spends the day quietly shining every pair in the house. The writer ends with this: “Now, whenever I hear of an acquaintance who has lost a loved one, I try to think of one specific task that suits that person’s need—such as washing the car, taking the dog to the kennel, or house-sitting during the funeral. And if the person says, ‘How did you know I needed that done?’ I reply, ‘It’s because a man once cleaned my shoes.’”
I don’t have many regrets over my 70 years of life. But the ones I do have all share one characteristic. They are not regrets regarding things I did. They are regrets for the things I could have done, but didn’t. Times I could have made the coffee, but chose not to.
I almost did not comment on this post because so many people already did, there is nothing new to say, etc. But then I realized that those very thoughts are exactly what the post is about. So, I put those thoughts aside and decided to “first have coffee.” I think all of us that read your blog do so because we enjoy your thoughtful posts that always give us something to chew on.
However, having a blog of my own, I totally understand how much time it takes. The very time that retirement calls us to play more and to seek ways to “pour coffee” for others a little more. So, while I really enjoy your original writing voice, I trust that you will choose quality pieces from other writers that will maintain the character of your blog. This article by Sahil was a great addition. Bonus that I have a new writer to go check out.
Love this post. I have also decided to retire earlier based on the “Twelve Good Years” post. Please keep sharing. Enjoy your trip especially Hocking Hills!
Thank you Pam, Sahil and Fritz!
Fritz, I love the guest posts. Please continue sharing.
I live in South Dakota now but am from Lamesa Texas, the seat of Dawson County. I know Pam Kearney the author. Small world.
Thank you for this wonderful post Fritz. I appreciate hearing from other excellent writers and I certainly appreciate your original content, as well. Thank you for expanding our minds and hearts with your thoughtful content.